BATTLE OF THE BANDS (BOTB)
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This Battle is dedicated to my great friend
[link> MARTIN BRUMER
Born: February 15, 1960
Killed by a car thief on: July 18, 1989
His all-time favorite song may have been
[link> 'Broken Bicycles' by Tom Waits.
And his favorite of all my stories was probably
this one which I'm about to retell below:
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"I lost my Saint Christopher
Now that I've kissed her"
~ Tom Waits
'Tom Traubert's Blues' from the album 'Small Change'
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Producer Bones Howe has said that another experience inspired "Tom Traubert's Blues". Recalling the experience, Howe said, "He [Waits] went down and hung around on Skid Row in L.A. because he wanted to get stimulated for writing this material. He called me up and said, 'I went down to skid row ... I bought a pint of rye. In a brown paper bag.'
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"I said, 'Oh really?'
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"'Yeah – hunkered down, drank the pint of rye, went home, threw up, and wrote 'Tom Traubert's Blues' [...] Every guy down there... every one I spoke to, a woman put him there'."
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"The piano has been drinking
And you can't find your waitress
With a Geiger counter
And she hates you and your friends
And you just can't get served without her" [*]
~ Tom Waits
'The Piano Has Been Drinking (Not Me)' from the album 'Small Change'
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[*Was Waits psychic? How did he predict in 1976 what The League Of Soul Crusaders would experience at Zucky's from 1981 through 1984 or '85?]
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On the evening of February 10th, I left a comment on one of John Holton's blog bits. The subject was Bubble Gum Pop music, and you can find that blog bit and my comment HERE.
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However, in part, I wrote the following:
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>>... Musically, I am all over the map (although Jazz is #1 for me), and as fate would have it, at this moment, I am listening to some of the strongest “anti-Bubble Gum” on record (a compilation CD of Tom Waits recordings, including songs like ‘Frank’s Wild Years’, ‘Mr. Siegel’, ‘Hang On, Saint Christopher’, and ‘I’m Your Late Night Evening Prostitute’ Ha!-Ha!).
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I wasn't planning to post a BOTB installment on the 15th, but TOM WAITS and the city of RENO, in Nevada, and Marty Brumer's upcoming birthday intruded into my peace of mind. So, going with this new-found inspiration, I am giving you another 3-Way BOTB with the following theme:
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TOM WAITS Songs That Mention RENO
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| Muddy (STMcC's stuffed dog) watches from the safety of the car while Stephen starts up a campfire in Somewhere, USA. |
One of my very best friends in this life is nicknamed POOH. Originally, he was nicknamed Lynth. But over time, Lynth got lengthened to Lynthy-Pooh. Then Lynthy-Pooh got shortened to Pooh. But over more time, Pooh got lengthened to General Poohregard. And, eventually, the nickname General Poohregard was shortened to Pooh. (That's a true story. And, no, you CAN'T make that stuff up!!)
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In 1984, I quit my job as a commercial sign designer and decided to make my living by betting on the race horses at Hollywood Park. (That was a job that lasted 5 or 6 weeks!)
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During those weeks, Pooh and I did a lot of drinking in Venice at the '99-Cent Club' (aka Azteca's 99-cent Margarita Special from about 10:00 AM until 1:00 or 2:00 PM).
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When Pooh and I weren't day-drinking at Azteca Mexican Restaurant, we were day-drinking at his place in "The House At Pooh Corner". That's where Pooh turned me onto the albums 'Trouble In Paradise' by Randy Newman and 'Small Change' by Tom Waits. At that time, those were our two favorite albums "To Booze By".
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In 1986, Lynth > Lynthy-Pooh > Pooh > General Poohregard > Pooh and I agreed to do a major road trip, driving from Los Angeles to Devil's Tower in Wyoming, and back again via the Grand Canyon and Virginia City, Nevada. Really, the whole point of the trip was to drink a shot of whiskey and a beer together at the 'Bucket Of Blood Saloon' in Virginia City. But we decided to take the long way there. (Remember this! You'll need it later.)
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I have taken MANY road trips all over the USA, but I still consider the 'Show No Emotion In A Big Way' Tour, in 1986, one of my very favorites of all time!
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Basically, Pooh and I just drank our way across the Western United States, and created many magnificent memories in the process. Below are some selected photos from the 'Show No Emotion In A Big Way' Tour:
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| "Woke up this morning and I got myself a beer" ~Jim Morrison -- STMcC, very hungover one 1986 morning in Bullhead City, Arizona - directly across the Colorado River from Laughlin, Nevada. |
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| "Woke up this morning and I got myself a beer" ~Jim Morrison -- Muddy in the same motel room in Bullhead City, Airheadzona, and every bit as hungover as STMcC was. |
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| STMcC and his stuffed buddy, Muddy, hitchhiking in Airheadzona, along an original stretch of the old and fabled 'ROUTE 66'. |
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| Muddy sitting smack-dab in the center of the original ROUTE 66. The driver of the oncoming white automobile must have been thinking: 'What The Phuq?!' |
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| Muddy (the stuffed dog) & STMcC in 'Prairie Dog Town', Wyoming. |
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| Spectacular sunbeam captured on film by (hungover) STMcC in The-Middle-Of-Nowhere, Wyoming. |
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| Pooh, killin' his 666th bottle of "Road Soda", at Devil's Tower, Wyomin'. |
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| Muddy 'n' me at Devil's Tower, Wyoming. |
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| Pooh, watching the Sun rise over the Grand Canyon in Arizona. |
On our way back to L.A., the plan was to drive right through Reno, Nevada, and head straight up the mountain pass called Geiger Grade, proceeding to legendary Virginia City for that shot of whiskey and a beer together at the 'Bucket Of Blood Saloon'. (You remember? The real point of the trip?! Pooh had never been to Virginia City, and I wanted to introduce him to the 'Bucket Of Blood Saloon'.) But when we pulled into Reno, I insisted that we stay there one night, and leave for Virginia City (just 30 minutes away) the following morning. Pooh said, "I don't know. I have a bad feeling about this place."
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And that's when I called Pooh a derogatory slang word that starts with "p" and ends with "ssy". (I'll let "u" figure it out.) So, we got a motel room in Reno, two or three blocks from Virginia Street - the primary thoroughfare in downtown Reno - and we promptly went out drinking... and drinking... and drinking... and drinking... etc., etc., etc.
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UHP! I WAS AN IDIOT!!
(I shoulda listened to the "Pooh-ssy".)
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I got completely laminated at 'Xenon's Lounge' (a long-defunct watering hole) and I drove everyone except the bartender out of the lounge by playing The Beach Boys' 'IN MY ROOM' about 666 times consecutively on the jukebox. Then Pooh and I staggered to Circus Circus and drank some more.
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Finally, at some point, Pooh decided he should stop drinking and go to sleep, so he told me he was going back to the motel. I said, "Fine. But I'm gonna stay here and drink."
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So, Pooh walked out of Circus Circus. ...And about two minutes later, he walked back in and said to me, "I don't know where the motel is."
I said, "Damn it, Pooh!! What's wrong with you?! Alright... I'll show you where the motel is, but then I'm coming back here to do some more drinking."
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He and I walked out of Circus Circus together and... wandered hopelessly lost around downtown Reno for what seemed like hours!! Eventually, we showed a taxi cab driver our room key with the motel's name on it, and he said he'd never heard of the place. (That was the genesis of our now-famous line, "Nobody helps drunken cowboys in Reno.")
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And the very next thing that Pooh and I knew, we woke up in our motel room in the morning with absolutely no recollection of having found the place the night before.
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I had the WORST HANGOVER of my entire drinking career. Pooh and I crawled to HAROLD'S CLUB on Virginia Street in downtown Reno, and I ordered some "hair-of-the-dog" (a '7&7').
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| Downtown RENO - 'HAROLD'S CLUB' on the left. Photo taken on the most hungover day of my entire life! |
We left Reno and headed for Virginia City. But we were both so hungover that somehow we found ourselves driving completely alone on a stretch of freeway. We couldn't understand why there were no other cars on it. We also couldn't understand why all the freeway signs were pointed backwards!!
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Apparently, it was an unfinished piece of freeway. Or maybe a section of freeway that had been closed for repairs. (That hilarious scene in 'Planes, Trains, And Automobiles' always reminds me of Pooh and I "driving out of Reno on the wrong side of the road".)
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This is Geiger Grade:
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While we were going up Geiger Grade, I said to Pooh, "Pull over. I think I'm gonna get sick." So, Pooh found a place to pull off to the side of the road, and I knelt in the dirt, but nuttin' came up. So, I got back in the car and we continued up Geiger Grade. And about two minutes later, I told Pooh, "Pull over. I think I'm gonna throw-up." Pooh found another place to pull off the road, I knelt in the dirt and upchucked that 7&7 ("hair-of-the-dog") that I had drunk at HAROLD'S CLUB in Reno.
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That incident inspired a free-form poem thingy that I wrote years later. It was titled [link> 'Trying To Upchuck Your Life On Geiger Grade'.
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When we got to Virginia City, instead of getting a shot of whiskey and a beer together at the 'Bucket Of Blood Saloon', we rented a room at the Sugarloaf Mountain Motel. I crawled into one of the beds and told Pooh, "I'm done for the day." It was probably about 10:00 AM at that point.
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Pooh decided to go explore the town, and I told him he could drink in any of the many saloons, but to stay out of the Bucket Of Blood Saloon, so we could go there tomorrow and get that shot and a beer together. Pooh agreed and headed into town.
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I spent the entire day in bed, on my back, staring at the ceiling. Then it got dark. And late. And Pooh still wasn't back. Finally, I heard running footsteps in the gravel, approaching the motel. The door opened and Pooh staggered in. I asked him, "Is someone chasing you?"
He said, "No", and fell face-forward onto his bed. He kicked off one of his tennis shoes and then immediately passed out. I spent the next hour or two literally "waiting for the other shoe to drop". It never did.
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The next morning, it was Pooh who had the hellacious hangover. "You didn't go into the Bucket Of Blood yesterday, did you?" I asked him.
"Well, I didn't think I did", Pooh answered. "But then this morning, I found this in my shirt pocket." He held up a Bucket Of Blood Saloon cocktail napkin for me to see. Then he added, "...And I'm starting to remember that maybe the bartender kicked me out of there last night."
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Later on, Pooh and I went into the Bucket Of Blood Saloon to finally get that long-awaited shot of whiskey and a beer together. The bartender looked up from behind the bar, took one glance at Pooh, and said, "Oh... I remember you from last night".
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| Pooh at the scene of the crime, and wearing an "improper" cowboy hat. |
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| STMcC (wearing a "proper" cowboy hat) with Muddy on the bar of the Bucket Of Blood Saloon. |
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| Back home after the vacation, STMcC's eyes are saying: "I'll never go on a road trip with that Pooh ever again!" |
Over the subsequent years, Pooh and I went on a few more road trips together, but they weren't crazy, drunken affairs like our trip to get a shot of whiskey and a beer together at the 'Bucket Of Blood Saloon' had been. In fact, on the very day that we got back to L.A. from the 'Show No Emotion In A Big Way' Tour, Pooh quit drinking. He's been sober for over 30 years.
{*Pooh, you winnah! You winnah!*}
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| Pooh (with a Mickey's Big Mouth) at Ashland Park in "Dogtown", 1986. The last day he ever took a drink. |
Alright, let's get on it. Let's get ON this thing!...
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TOM WAITS Songs That Mention RENO
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VIRGINIA AVENUE {*Really named "Street"*} -- 1973
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v3CEkvvpCF4
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WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD -- 1978
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OrtawKgq0Tc
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HANG ON, SAINT CHRISTOPHER -- 1987
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBqFq0c1ANU
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Alright now, “you know the gig”... I welcome you (whether I know "you" or not) to vote for your favorite of these songs in the comment section below. And feel free to tell us WHY you chose one song over the other.
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After voting here, I suggest - actually I insist - you pop over to the blogs of the other 'BATTLE OF THE BANDS' participants to see which songs they have chosen and vote there also.
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Voice Your Vote...
@ TOSSING IT OUT by clicking HERE
@ MIKE'S RAMBLINGS by clicking HERE
@ THE SOUND OF ONE HAND TYPING by clicking HERE
@ JINGLE JANGLE JUNGLE by clicking HERE
@ THE DOGLADY'S DEN by clicking HERE
@ CHERDO ON THE FLIPSIDE by clicking HERE
@ CURIOUS AS A CATHY by clicking HERE
@ AI LOVE MUSIC by clicking HERE
@ STORMS & STARDUST by clicking HERE
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As I've done in the past, I will continue to return to my 'BOTB' blog bits on the 7th (or 21st) of each month to post my own votes and announce the winner.
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~ Stephen T. McCarthy
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Ha Ha! That musical divide is sumpin' else.
ReplyDeleteI am voting for St. Christopher. At least in that one Waits has "processed" his voice down more into the background. It is quieter than the music and therefore more difficult to hear. THAT is a wonderful thing! He may have been a great lyricist, but that voice!?!?
That is quite a story about the road trip. I am surprised you guys weren't arrested at some point. Never having been a drinker, I find the bar hopping aspect hard to relate to. The road trip part? THAT I relate to. And I have been to several of the very spots in your photos. I was at the Prairie Dog Town a year and a half ago, for example. Funny thing: the prairie dogs were all staggering around drunk... maybe you got them started 34 years ago.
SIXGUNBOY ~
DeleteYeah, The Great Musical Divide is DEFINITELY a real thing. SMH!!
But in this case, it's probably not quite as drastic as you're thinking it is. Here is my longtime view of Waits:
I love the "Pre-'83" Tom Waits!
If one really pays attention, they will discover that on his first album ('CLOSING TIME' - 1973) and his second album ('THE HEART OF SATURDAY NIGHT' - 1974), Waits had a raw, rough-edged but melodic voice. In fact, that second album from '74 is one of my Top Ten favorite albums of all time (regardless of genre). His melodies were terrific and his lyricism was on a completely new level from anything that had come before (including Bob Dylan) or since.
Beginning with his third album ('NIGHTHAWKS AT THE DINER' - 1975), one can clearly tell that Waits had begun artificially laying on the "Satchmo" voice bit. He was natural-sounding on the first two records, but faking that gruff, growling voice thereafter. It was cartoonish.
And he's retained that "fake voice" for the remainder of his career. Although it's hard to listen to most of the time, he was still writing such exceptional songs, with lyrics that NO ONE HAS YET MATCHED, that I just tolerated, put up with, trained myself to grin and bear that ridiculous voice in order to listen to the songs. ('NIGHTHAWKS...' is a *wonderful* album, despite the artificial voice that Waits is laying on so damned thick!!)
Proof that Waits has been faking that voice since 1975, is his soundtrack album for the movie 'ONE FROM THE HEART' in 1982. On that recording, Waits mostly went back to his natural voice that we heard on the first two albums. Francis Ford Coppola (or someone associated with his production company) probably told Waits something like this: This will be a soundtrack album for a movie that is meant to have wide, mainstream appeal. Therefore, we need the music to be sung in a way that won't be too difficult for most people to wrap their ears around it.
For the most part, Waits really tones down the voice fakery on that album, and sounds much more like he did in '73 and '74. But afterwards, he went right back to the put-on "Satchmo on steroids" voice for his albums.
Note that the 'ONE FROM THE HEART' soundtrack came out in '82. And that's one reason why I always say I like "The pre-'83 Tom Waits". He (deliberately, IMO) got really weird after that movie soundtrack, and I dislike probably 98.5% of everything he's recorded since '82.
But, that second album is his high-water mark. And the '82 soundtrack came close to it. It's my second favorite movie soundtrack of all time, and probably my 11th favorite album of all time. Both of those are easily two of my very, Very, VERY most frequently played compact discs!!
>>... Funny thing: the prairie dogs were all staggering around drunk... maybe you got them started 34 years ago.
Ha!-Ha! They're probably still laminated from the fumes, having been in such close proximity to 'The Idjit Twins'.
~ D-FensDogG
'Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...'
Your reply to "Beer for the Shower" and all this other yakkin' 'bout drinking - sometimes heavy - prompted me to add another comment.
DeleteI can't remember if we ever talked about this before via email (I suspect we did, and that my age and you past boozing have blotted out our memories,) but I had a brief period of about a month or two when I actually tried drinking. I never drank anything alcoholic all until the age of 30, and that’s when I tried.
At that time I went thru a divorce (that’s not what prompted drinking) and started dating again. And I dated a girl who thought it would be fun to see me drunk. Since I'd never tried drinking and was always very much in control of mind and body, I guess she thought It would be interesting.
So I told her I'd try it. One night I took her out to a comedy club, and over the course of about three hours I drank two kamikazes, four seven/sevens, and two tall London Ice Teas.
Nuttin'. No effect. I literally didn't feel one bit different. I kept saying: "when is something supposed to happen?" She said something was ALREADY supposed to have happened. I've been told that's a LOT of booze for such a short time, but what do I know?
I tried a few more evenings of taste-testing liquor. I hated it all and never felt a danged thing. Then I quit, having never wanted to do it in the first place. I STILL have never tasted beer. I hear it sucks. (Sorry Beer for the Shower!)
SHEBOYGANBRO ~
DeleteHa! Yeah, I do remember you telling me that story in the distant past.
Beer is, for almost everyone, an acquired taste. You would definitely think it sucks the first time (including the beer that is actually named "Sucks" - which at one time was my very favorite).
I would say that IS a good amount of liquor for a three-hour drinking session. (And I'm assuming you meant 'Long Island Iced Tea', unless a 'London Iced Tea' is a variation on the original.) However, it's also true that casinos and nightclubs are notorious for serving watered-down drinks at high prices. It's doubtful that those were the same potency of drinks you'd have been served at a real bar / saloon (such as The Old Corner Bar at Piper's Opera House in Virginia City).
But you may indeed have a much higher than normal tolerance for hooch. We'll find out when you drink with me in Virginia City... later today.
:^D
Booze is actually interesting because of how various types affect different people in various ways (due to slight differences in chemical makeup). For example, I was a pretty jolly drunk most of the time. But if I overindulged in Tequila, I could get angry and mean. Grand Marnier and lotsa red wine was, for me, the warmest glow. The buzzes were all different according to what I was consuming (or combining).
I used to say that I wished I could go through life with a permanent three-beer morning buzz on a 75% hangover. With that tingling sensation that would run down my arms into my hands, and my mind suddenly so fluid that I felt I was in some incredible Creativity Zone.
With The League, many drinking sessions began in the morning and ended in the wee early hours of the next morning. (We were young and stupid.) We might each drink a half pint of 80-proof hooch and three beers while we were just getting dressed and arguing about where we were going to go out drinking that night. SMH!
Soon as Mr. Peabody perfects that Waybac Machine, I'm-a take you and Beer Boy with me back to the heyday of The League and put y'all to the test! ;^)
~ Stephen
DogGtor of Alcohology &
King of Inebriation Nation
I've never been on a road trip like that one. Probably not a bad thing, either. D'ya ever look back at your drinking experiences and say, "how the **** did I live through that?"
ReplyDeleteAnyway, the song I liked the best of these three was "Wrong Side of the Road," so that gets my vote.
JOHN ~
DeleteWe have all reflected on our misspent youth - the years of incredible lamination - and realized that we had our guardian angels working overtime to the max (like, quadruple time).
I wrote a book manuscript that covered just over 3 years, and it was filled with stories similar to this one. We have often wondered how it was possible that no one so much as lost a finger or a toe. It was amazing!!
Interestingly, although most of the boys eventually quit drinking altogether, none of us regrets those years. We have way more entertaining stories to tell in our old age than most peoples do!
~ D-FensDogG
'Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...'
In everyone's life, there should be at least a few epic journey's or lost weekends. Amnesic black holes make it more interesting and alcohol...well, it has been used as a preservative...
ReplyDeleteI love a good story. You should add a moral to the story. 😁
Tom Waits is an epic journey wrapped up in a poet. I'm voting for "Wrong Side of the Road" and happy to see a Waits vs Waits vs Waits battle.
Ciao, brudder!
Cherdo
DOC MacSIS ~
Delete>>... I love a good story. You should add a moral to the story. 😁
Whatchoo yakkin' 'bout, Sis?
I *DID* add a moral to the story! Whatcha call this?:
Back home after the vacation, STMcC's eyes are saying: "I'll never go on a road trip with that Pooh ever again!"
Now, just because I didn't heed the moral of the story in subsequent years does not mean that there was no moral.
>>... and alcohol...well, it has been used as a preservative...
There's a reason I look 20 years younger than my actual age!! ;^)
I realize that Tom Waits isn't everyone's mug o' stout, but I'm just a channel for this stuffs. I have very little say in who will be featured on this blog and in what manner.
~ D-FensDogG
'Ferret-Faced Fascist Friends'
Nobody is EVERYBODY'S mug o' anything. :-)
DeleteReally?
DeleteGee... I have always believed that I was "Every Woman's Mug O' Fantasy"!
Now, at the young age of 60, I learn it twarn't the truth?! This is a bitter beer to swallow but... I'll do muh best, Sis.
;^)
~ Stephen
DogGtor of Alcohology &
King of Inebriation Nation
Looks like my computer is going to allow me some time on line this morning. Let's see how long this will last.
ReplyDeleteI don't think I'd enjoy a road trip like you described, but I'm not much of a drinker and never have been. Now a trip that included other types of mind-altering substances might have been more to my liking and I have taken more than a few of those--with some drinking on the side perhaps.
Of the three Waits songs offered I'm going with the first, "Virginia Avenue"--kind of relaxing listening for my morning.
Arlee Bird
Tossing It Out
Howdy, MR. LEE ~
DeleteGlad to see your computer is feeling a wee bit generous this morning.
>>... Now a trip that included other types of mind-altering substances might have been more to my liking
I've never been a drug guy (excepting booze, of course). But a trip to the 1966 Batcave on "brownies" or "chocolate" would be something pretty extraordinary... I would imagine.
That trip The Pooh and I made in '86 was a hoot and a half! Of course, there was some hangover pain included, but a guy must pay the piper who plays the tune he dances to. My body could never survive a trip like that today. I don't think my body could even survive just ONE of those nights. That's why I have a very, very strict limit on how much I drink nowadays. If my 23-year-old self could confront my 60-year-old-self, the youngster would call the geezer a derogatory slang word that starts with "p" and ends in "ssy". (I'll let "u" figure out what word that is.)
Glad you could make it by to cast a BOTB bote. Now all three of Tom's tunes (if we can call all of them "tunes") has received at least one bote.
~ D-FensDogG
'Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...'
I love your journey which made it even more “memorable” by all the great drinking you both did. I have had my share of “what the hell happened last night” and those are some of the best even if I still don’t remember. I know that this is not politically correct nowadays but hell..I enjoyed myself. A nice tribute to your dear friend and I will pick the first song by Waits which I truly enjoyed
ReplyDeleteWhere have you been, BIRGIT?!?!
DeleteI've been waiting for someone to come along here and "get it". Thank you!
My dear friend, Marty, liked to remind us that his name rhymed with "party". And I began this blog bit by saying this about him:
His all-time favorite song may have been 'Broken Bicycles' by Tom Waits.
And his favorite of all my stories was probably
this one which I'm about to retell below:
There's a reason Marty so often asked me to "tell that story again". And it's because, although he himself really wasn't much of a drinker (he wouldn't drink a shot of booze if someone poured it above the line painted on the shot glass!!), he recognized the hilarity in this story. I mean, these are the sorts of episodes that make for hilarious scenes in movies. And I'm a bit surprised that all the non-drinkers that have preceded you here have apparently failed to see the crazy humor in this story.
>>... I have had my share of “what the hell happened last night” and those are some of the best even if I still don’t remember.
Cheers! Bottoms up!!
In one of my comment sections, I recently wrote the story about how one Saint Patrick's Day night the League of Soul Crusaders got ripped and the next morning couldn't agree on whether there had been a band at the Irish pub they'd visited the night before, and whether or not they had paid a cover charge to get in. It's a fantastic (and TRUE!) drinking story, but I'm afraid it was wasted on this crowd. (See if I invite them to the Sake Party I'm planning. But YOU I will invite!!)
As my good friend Nitro (aka Faraway Eyes) reminded me on my last birthday:
"Alcohol doesn't solve any problems,
but then again, neither does milk.
"Besides, no good story ever started with milk."
Thanks for participating in this off-the-cuff Tom Waits extravaganza!
~ D-FensDogG
'Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...'
I have been a hot or miss so I am so sorry for that. I am dealing with this pain which is getting worse all over my body again but the bad pain is in my right hip. It get discouraging when I try to dust and I have to sit down after 20 minutes because the pain shoots up and down. Anyhoo, I was surprised no one talked about your fun escapade with your friend. These are great stories. I have one where I was at Octoberfest and there were antics in our hotel room resulting in someone throwing out my shoe. When I asked for it, the crowd was watching our hotekl room and not the laser show. I got my show back:)
Delete>>... the bad pain is in my right hip. It get discouraging when I try to dust and I have to sit down after 20 minutes because the pain shoots up and down.
DeleteDust? What is that?
If it hurts when you "dust" (whatever that is), I, the good DogGtor, prescribes this to you:
Lots of Jack Daniel's and no dusting!!
"But no, but no, but no"! (as Pooh always used to say)... I hope you're feeling much, much better real soon.
I'm glad you enjoyed my story. And, had I been there, I'd-a thrown your shoe back to you.
Nobody ever threw a shoe of mine out of a window, but someone once threw a big plastic dog out through our living room window. And then my Brother threw some dry dog food out the window, so the big plastic dog wouldn't starve to death on our front porch. (Yeah... true story.)
~ Stephen
DogGtor of Alcohology &
King of Inebriation Nation
POSTSCRIPT:
DeleteDid I mention that the living room window was NOT open when the big plastic dog went out through it?
~ D-FensDogG
Hey there Stephen!
ReplyDeleteGreat story! I read it aloud to The Cute One and we were howling with laughter all the way through. My God, the 80's were a great time, weren't they?
As for the battle, I'm going to go with Wrong Side of the Road (not because of the story, but because I really enjoyed that one the most)
I asked The Cute One which one he would vote for - he said he want to vote for the story and not vote on any of the songs. He also said 'Congrats to Pooh on his sobriety. That's not an easy accomplishment. Every time I think I'm done drinking, I need to have 'just one more''.
Off to start my final week of radiation. Will catch up with you soon.
~Mary
MMQE ~
DeleteGlad you enjoyed the story! It *IS* a damned funny story, but maybe one needs to have been a former party animal to really appreciate it.
>>... the 80's were a great time, weren't they?
That's what they tell me. ;^)
Alrighty then -- one bote for 'Wrong Side Of The Road' and one bote for the story.
>>... Every time I think I'm done drinking, I need to have 'just one more''.
I may very well be wrong about this, but if memory serves me, I think it was Pete Townshend who once said: Quitting drugs and drinking is easy! I've done it hundreds of times!
I love that quote!
Gotcha in my prayers daily, Mary! Keep up the faith and that positive attitude. That's the biggest part of the battle!!
~ D-FensDogG
'Ferret-Faced Fascist Friends'
So I'm just curious - with you sitting down at the bar, plopping down cute lil' Muddy on the countertop - did anyone ever say anything or try to mess with you, or did they take one look at the cowboy hat and leather jacket and think twice of it?
ReplyDeleteI know I've told you before that no one has ever managed to get me drunk. With that said, and after reading this story, I have a feeling the League could have gotten me plastered out of my mind, to the point that even *I'd* be praying to Geiger Grade. What a story. No wonder you never wanted to publish that novel of your drinking career.
As for the battle, this was a toughie but a goodie, and after some deliberation, ultimately I've got to give my bote to Wrong Side of the Road.
Muddy has seen more of this country than most people probably have. But I think the 'Bucket Of Blood Saloon' *MAY* have been the only time I ever took him into a bar. And no one gave me any trouble.
DeleteIn fact, I can think of only two times when I was in a situation that could have turned into a bout of fisticuffs in or just outside a bar:
1) We were at the Sunspot nightclub on the Pacific Coast Highway one night when Marty (yes, the same Marty for whom this blog bit Battle is a tribute) came up to me and said that "Joe Schmoe" was talking some trash to him, trying to egg him into a fight.
"Joe Schmoe" had been involved in some bar fights and fancied himself to be some kind of tough-guy brawler. He had a reputation for that. But "Joe" was a friend to Cranium, who was in The League Of Soul Crusaders, so "Joe" knew who we were.
Marty was no fighter, so I told him, "Don't worry about it. I'll talk to him."
I found "Joe" in the nightclub, walked up and pointed Marty out to him, and said, "I just thought I'd let you know that Marty is a friend of mine."
He replied, "Oh, is that so?", with this kind of dismissive tone.
I said, "Yeah, that's so. I just thought you might want to know that." And then I walked away.
Marty had no more trouble with "Joe".
2) One time, I got into a shoving match with a Black bouncer in front of 'Mom's Saloon'. But the thing was that the bouncer, who normally worked at 'Mom's Saloon', was off duty on this particular night, and he was drunk, and told Cranium that Cranium couldn't sit on the hood of his own Cadillac. WTP?!?!
So, I tried to defuse the situation by leading the bouncer away from Cranium's Cadillac. Then he decided to shove me, so I shoved him back, harder... and then The League converged on the situation to pull us apart.
So, phunny thing, both times that I *COULD* have wound up in a bar-related fight were instances where I was actually defending friends of mine.
>>... I have a feeling the League could have gotten me plastered out of my mind, to the point that even *I'd* be praying to Geiger Grade.
Ha! Yeah, man, if you could hang in there with The League, you were a total PRO!
I think I may have mentioned this once before, but there was this really nice guy we knew who had a reputation for being a big boozehound. One night, he partied with The League, and later that night he threw up. And he told Nappy (I think it was Nappy) that it was the only time he ever threw up from drinking. ...He just couldn't hang with The League. We were hard to keep up with, mang!
One night, right after walking into 'The Oar House', we bought some pitchers of beer and set them down on the table. I reached into my black leather jacket, pulled out a bottle of Excedrin and slammed it down on the table right next to the pitchers. Some guy we didn't know saw that and said, "Oh, man! You guys are HARDCORE!!"
Ha!-Ha!
Terrific memories of my misspent youth!
~ D-FensDogG
'Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...'
Stephen,
ReplyDeleteFirst thing, I'm sorry to read you lost a good friend to a stupid car thief. I hope he was captured and prosecuted for his crime. What a senseless, unnecessary loss of life, a true tragedy!
I have to know, honestly doing all that boozing was it really fun or was it just being with your buddy on a long road trip that was fun? I can't wrap my brain around all that drinking. Seriously, it sounds like a lot of unnecessary misery for one to inflict purposely on him/herself and since I don't like pain then I happily pass on that kind of fun. :)
Tom Waits is an artist that you or another BoTBer introduced me to some years ago. While a talented soul that he is, I admit he's not my go-to mewsician. That being said, I'm giving my vote VIRGINIA AVENUE. Of the three Tom Waits songs this one just appealed to my ears best this morning.
Thanks for visiting over the weekend and casting your vote in my Heart and Soul #BoTB Showdown, my friend! Have a good week!
CATHY! It's That You?
DeleteThe car thief was indeed captured and prosecuted. I went to the trial to get a good look at him, because if justice had not been done (as it frequently isn't in our so-called "Justice System"), I was going to find the guy and dispense justice to him myself.
But, they put his ass in prison for many years. Which was probably easier for him than what I intended to do if they hadn't.
>>... I have to know, honestly doing all that boozing was it really fun or was it just being with your buddy on a long road trip that was fun?
Honestly? I would say: "Both". I have more and funnier stories than anyone I personally know. But, of course, I wasn't a (Maverick) Christian then. Today, I know perfectly well what 'The Word Of God' says about drunkenness, and that's why I don't get drunk anymore.
If I knew then what I know now, I would NOT have participated in the murdering of all those brain cells. But I didn't. And since I can't change any of it now, I don't bother regretting it. I actually did learn quite a bit from all that partying, and today I look at it as just part of the process of learning and becoming the person I am today. All of life is a learning process - we're "learning" (not "earning") our way back to God, our true Source. So, there's no point in regretting any part of the learning process.
And I'll tell ya one thing, there was a ton o' bonding that went on during those partying years. Some lifelong friendships were established that probably would not have been had we not all met over a bottle... or (on rare occasions) two.
;^)
~ D-FensDogG
'Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...'
I remember those days of boozin' and carousin' well, even though there are a few gaps in the memory. Never drank as much as you guys did, though. It's a wonder you survived, Stephen! Makes for a great story, though. 😃 And it even comes with a Tom Waits soundtrack, which is cool. Lovely tribute to your friend!
ReplyDeleteMy preference for this battle is Wrong Side of the Road, for its bluesy vibe and the sax. Can never get enough sax. 😏
DEBBIE ~
Delete>>... I remember those days of boozin' and carousin' well, even though there are a few gaps in the memory.
Right, right.
You mean like this?:
One night (1982 or '83), this girl and some of her girlfriends came over to our Bay Street house, and as soon as she walked in, she shouted to me, "Hey, Stephen!..."
She came over to me and started yakkin'. And the whole time she's talking to me, my mind is thinking: Who the hell is this girl? I've never seen her before! How does she know me?
And I was trying to act calm 'n' cool and play off this conversation with her, without letting her know that I had no idea who she was or what her name was.
Finally, I managed to excuse myself and got out of the yakversation with her. And I went up to Twinkie (another member of The League Of Soul Crusaders), I pointed at the girl and asked him:
"Who is that girl? And how the hell does she know everything about my life?!"
Twinkie said: "Dude! Are you serious? You spent about an hour and a half talking with her in the kitchen last night!"
Yeah... there were some "gaps in the memory".
>>... Can never get enough sax.
{*Cough!-Cough!*}
Right, right.
;^)
~ D-FensDogG
'Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...'
And Stephen,
ReplyDeleteGreat battle! Even better storytelling! And it ain't fiction! Thanks for taking me down I can't remember lane. I do remember much of that road trip, certainly remember pieces of Reno and Virginia City. What with the Bucket of Blood and all. I forgot you had pictures of the last beer (sic). I have a photo taken with that improper hat after my "if you're going to have one last beer you might as well make it 5 Budweisers." Don't think I would be writing this now if I didn't up and quit. Yup, I said it! I'm a quitter and a winner as a result, in this case any way.
Good times my friend, good times. Send me a copy of that beer in Ashland Park photo when you have a minute.
Now back to our regularly scheduled programming: My vote goes for Hang on Saint Christopher which captures the chaos of our drinking careers a bit better than the others. Also, you know we had Guardian Angels a looking over us who must have been hanging on for dear life on an occasion or two. Excuse me, I have to go nail a crow to the door.
Lotsa JW,
General Poohregard "Pooh" Lynth
...AND, POOH, THAT'S NOT ALL!...
DeleteI thanks ya!
This was one of those stories that pretty much write themselves. All you gotta do is type what happened and it's automatically a great story. I take no credit for it. I wasn't story-telling; I was jus' typin'.
>>... I do remember much of that road trip
Remember being mad at me for listening to my Ma and having a spare key to your car when we were locked out of it and it was starting to rain at Devil's Tower? Ha!-Ha! (This blog bit was already too long, so I didn't even "go there".)
>>... I have a photo taken with that improper hat after my "if you're going to have one last beer you might as well make it 5 Budweisers."
HA!-HA!!-HALARIOUS!!!
I'd forgotten about that line. But now that you've jogged my memory...
"If you're only going to have one beer, you might as well make it six Mickey's."
I came up with that one day in Lucky Liquor, while trying to decide what to buy. You were protly with me at the time. It didn't make a lick of sense -- just like the rest of our lives at that time. But that line sure had some staying-power, eh?
Yeah, muh Bruhthuh, I'll get a copy of that photo made and send it yer way. Everyone should have a photo of the 5th or 6th last beer they ever drank in their life.
:-D
>>... Also, you know we had Guardian Angels a looking over us who must have been hanging on for dear life on an occasion or two.
I wouldn't be a bit surprised if our guardian angels occasionally (temporarily) abandoned us because it got too scary for them! Ha!
Love ya, McBruhthuh!
("John Wayne! John Wayne!")
~ D-FensDogG
'Ferret-Faced Fascist Friends'
Al Bondigas here. I like a lot of Tom Wait's stuffs. Occasionally I'll listen to one of his albums on Spotify at the gym. Even if the music doesn't match my workout I'll still listen to it because I enjoy the lyrics so much. It seems to me he should have been more popular than he was, or was he very popular and I'm not aware of it? Anyway, I kind of went back and forth a couple of times, but eventually settled for "Virginia Avenue" slightly over "Hang on Saint Christopher". So, muh rulin' be fer "Virginia Avenue". That's it!! That's muh rulin'!! And yes, those guys did drink more than they should have. We tried to tell em didn't we Stephen? Phew!!
ReplyDeleteJUDGE MEATBALL ~
DeleteYou continue to suhprahze, suhprahze, suhprahze me! I figured for sure that, for you, this would be a slam-dunk vote for 'Virginia Avenue'.
Tom Waits has always been a kind of avant-garde, fringe artist. Other musicians have recognized his exceptional talent and covered his material, but he's always been a bit too weird for mainstream audiences.
Like the countless songwriters who followed in the giant shadow cast by Bob Dylan, Tom Waits was obviously inspired by Dylan's revolutionary way of writing songs. Dylan was the pathfinder and his immense influence can't possibly be overstated.
Nearly everyone attempted to emulate Dylan's abstract, psychedelically poetic lyric style (including The Beatles who, in my opinion, barely even rose to the level of second-rate Dylan impersonators). But, Tom's mind having been lit on fire by the Dylanesque approach to writing lyrics, found a way to take that approach and make it his own.
Dylan will, in my book, always be on top because he was the true innovator. Plus, I don't think, lyrically-speaking, that anyone will ever be able to match, much less surpass, 'It's Alright, Ma (I'm Only Bleeding)'.
But all of that aside, Tom Waits' songwriting from '73 through '82, impresses me more than any other songwriter's output does.
I think Tom's song [Link> BROKEN BICYCLES may have been Marty's all time favorite because, I know for sure, there was no other song he went around singing as much as he did that one. (And we both heard it for the first time together when we went to Westwood to see the movie 'One From The Heart'.) The symbolism / analogies presented in that song make it very clear that the writer was a true lyrical genius.
And, heck, that's not even my favorite Tom Waits song. For the words, I would probably choose [Link> SAN DIEGO SERENADE.
>>... And yes, those guys did drink more than they should have. We tried to tell em didn't we Stephen?
We sure did, Mayor. Er-- I mean... Judge! We sure did, Judge.
;^)
~ Stephen
DogGtor of Alcohology &
King of Inebriation Nation
I like a beer, a shot of whiskey, a roadtrip and Tom Waits. My vote is for "Wrong Side of the Road"
ReplyDeleteMIKE ~
DeleteWe need to get together sometime at the Bucket Of Blood Saloon and have a shot of whiskey and a beer together. (Hopefully you won't get 86'd from the saloon about 10 or 11 hours before I can join ya there.)
~ Stephen
DogGtor of Alcohology &
King of Inebriation Nation
ATTENTION PEOPLES!
ReplyDeleteIf you are interested in seeing the final vote tally for this 'BATTLE OF THE BANDS' installment and my closing thoughts on it, you can put the following URL into your browser:
http://stmccpresentsbattleofthebands.blogspot.com/2020/02/botb-results-feb-15-2020-or-tom-waits.html
~ D-FensDogG
'Loyal American Underground'