Monday, April 1, 2024

BATTLE OF THE BANDS: 2024, APRIL FOOLS' DAY (Or, TINY'S CHAMPAGNE VERSUS CHARLIE'S BEER)


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DogGs & DogGesses ~ 
This being April Fools' Day, I felt that a couple of fun & foolish songs were in order for Battle Of The Bands' Battle Of The Booze
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Hereabouts, I am a legendary notorious Tiny Tim fan. And although I do genuinely dig 73.84% of Tiny's music, I knew that he would be a perfect fit for my April Fools' Day BOTB installment. Q: Is there a fun & foolish song I can find to use against big Tiny? A: Yes! I found an ideal competitor in Charlie Daniels.
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What we've got here is  failure to communicate Tiny's champagne versus Charlie's beer. Or, 'Then I'd Be Satisfied With Life' versus 'Uneasy Rider'.
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All I want is wheat germ for my breakfast
A CHAMPAGNE fountain sizzlin' at my feet
While Rockefeller waitin' on the table
And Lombardo's band a-playin' while I eat.
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If I only owned Western Union cable
And if Tuesday Weld would only be my wife 
(*Tiny, I love you!*)
If I could only stay sixteen forever and ever and ever
Then I know that I'd be satisfied with life.
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Fun Fact: In Tiny's song, Nico (of The Velvet Underground fame) played the role of Tuesday Weld.
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I just ordered up a BEER and sat down at the bar
When some guy walked in and said, "Who owns this car 
with the Peace sign, the mag wheels, and four on the floor?"
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Well, he looked at me and I damn-near died
And I decided that I'd just wait outside
So I laid a dollar on the bar and headed for the door
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Alright, let's get on it. 
Let's get ON this foolishness!
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Then I'd Be Satisfied With Life
by Tiny Tim
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Uneasy Rider 
by The Charlie Daniels Band
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Remember: This is really about the songs and not the booze. So, in ye olde comment section, please vote for which song you liked better betwixt these two, and then please visit the other wonderful BOTBers and also drop your two cents in their comment sections.
* See the BOTBer links over there --->
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I'll return here on or about April 8th with my own vote and the final tally. 
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~ Stephen T. McC

25 comments:

  1. This might seem like a stupid question but is Tiny Tim singing in the video you provided? The reason I ask is I can't hear him. I hear the music, just no vocals. The music sounds good.

    I pretty much went into this battle knowing who I'd give my vote to and it didn't change anything listening to songs. I'm giving my vote to Charlie Daniels Band. "Uneasy Rider" is hilarious, too! Have a bandtastic week, Stephen!!

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    1. CAThy, my friend! ~

      Thanks for coming by with a "bote" in my newest BOTB's BOTB installment.

      I'm guessing you must have had a temporary glitch in your computer's speaker system, since I'm hearing Tiny's voice just fine and no one else has reported a problem.

      Perhaps your computer is engaged in a personal boycott of big Tiny's singing? ;-D

      Anyways, little Charlie appreciates your support!

      ~ D-FensDogG

      Delete
  2. Happy April Fool's Day, Stephen. What a hilarious battle! 🤣🤣🤣 I prefer champagne to beer both in life and in song. 🥂 Tiny sounds much better to me when he's not singing falsetto! So, this is a red letter day, as I'm voting for him. 🤯 Charlie Daniels was too hardcore country for my tastes, and, as a non-American, the lyrics didn't resonate either. Sorry! 🇨🇦

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    1. DEBBIE D'DOGLADY ~

      Glad to know you appreciated this silly Battle!

      Just when you thought you'd seen everything, you find yourself voting for Tiny Tim! Ain't this ol' world just full o' surprises?

      I believe the only song that the vast majority of people know by Tiny Tim is the big hit he had, 'Tip-Toe Thru The Tulips', so they assume that everything he sang was in that super-high falsetto. Once upon a time, I mistakenly had assumed the same thing. Then when I bought a boxed set of his music - really just as a silly Christmas joke - I too was pleasantly startled to learn that Tiny had a big baritone voice that he frequently used in his songs. And those are his songs I like the most and which transformed me into a genuine Tiny Tim fan. Plus, the guy had a very unique personality and was never afraid to simply be his true (weird) self. I really, greatly respect that about him!

      ~ D-FensDogG

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  3. This is without a doubt the WACKIEST battle you've done yet! I spent a LOT of time thinking about what the heck you were planning on this, and assumed that you were going to find a song that Tuesday Weld actually sung. "Wrong-o, Bar Rag Breath!" There is actually one song she did sing - without credit - from "I'll Take Sweden." Terrible song badly sung. But no booze reference so I knew that wasn't it. The John Birch connection really had me flummoxed! But all (apparently) is revealed.

    There is not much these songs have in common other than the reference to booze. Both songs are fun, and Charlie's song is pretty funny, too.

    But Tiny Tim has once again earned my vote with a good song using his real voice instead of the falsetto. And if I were not already satisfied with life, I too would be quite satisfied with Tuesday Weld.

    I have no clue how this battle is gon turn out!

    Sixgun McItchyfinger

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    1. McBROTHER SIXGUNBOY ~

      You're right! I can't think of a wackier BOTB match-up I've ever put together. Looking through all of the songs I have lined up to use in my 'Battle Of The Booze' series, I realized that these two would be perfect for April Fools' Day. Plus, I also liked the fact that stylistically they were as different as night & day - or, as different as George M. Cohan & Country music! (As I mentioned to you previously, Cohan actually wrote 'Then I'd Be Satisfied With Life', but Tiny reworked several aspects of it in order to inject himself into it and make it uniquely his own.)

      Somewhat ironically, Tiny is battling against a classic "storytelling song" by Charlie Daniels, and Tiny once revealed to a journalist that he disliked storytelling songs. So far, this is a close contest, and I loves that!

      ~ D-FensDogG

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  4. I don't recall ever hearing that Tiny Tim song before, but I used to hear the CDaniels song a lot and was a big Daniels fan. I hadn't heard this song of his since back then, but I recalled it. As soon as I started listening to Tiny's song I figured I'd be voting for him, but I gave Charlie another chance for the memories. Damn! That's still a fun story song.

    Guess I've got to give my vote to Charlie Daniels.

    Lee

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    1. ARLEE BOIDMAN ~

      I dig the fact that you actually liked both of the songs in this Battle!

      This contest was one of the very few I've ever done in which I felt *entirely* unsure of how it might turn out. Generally, I have a pretty good idea about which contestant is likely to win. (Often it's the 'margin of victory' I am unsure of.) But in this case, I felt like a blank slate, having no really clear idea of what to anticipate. Therefore, it was a fun one to concoct, and I'm enjoying the fact it's a tight race, up to this point, anyway.

      ~ D-FensDogG

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  5. Stephen -

    Knock twice to let us know you're okay. I fear you may have been abducted and there is an imposter posting on your behalf.

    Fun battle you have here! I tire easily of Tiny Tim's vibrato, but I could listen to Charlie Daniels story telling all day long.

    You know what that means - give my vote to Charlie.

    -MMQE

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    1. MMQE ~

      *Knock!-Knock!*
      "Who's there?"
      "It's me, it's me, it's Stephen T.!"
      [Not to be confused with Ernest T.]

      I'm pleased as spiked punch to know that you found the Battle "fun". That's what I was definitely shooting for in an April Fools' Day contest.

      Charlie appreciated your support and told me to tell you, "Dew Drop Inn anytime you wish to visit him."

      ~ D-FensDogG

      Delete
  6. Fun battle, Stephen T. - and happy April.
    I'm glad to know Tiny Tim had another voice ;-) But I'm for Charlie Daniels - all the way! Cheers to Uneasy Riders everywhere! Love that song!

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    1. Howdy, dIEDRE ~

      Thank you, my friend.
      I'll tell ya what... this April would be happier
      if the rain and snow would go, Go, GO!

      I also really enjoy 'Uneasy Rider'. For one thing, it's just so politically incorrect in several ways. And you know, I myself simply do not do political correctness. (I usually kick it right in the knee! ;-)

      ~ D-FensDogG

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  7. I am going to vote for Tiny Tim on this on no fooling

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    1. MIKE ~

      Did you ever imagine that there would be a time when you would vote for Tiny Tim?

      Interestingly, Tiny has done pretty well in the history of BOTB. I remember him even beating Garth Brooks once... which I really, REALLY loved! He may not prevail against Charlie Daniels here, but he's certainly putting up a respectable fight... in Jackson, Mississippi.

      ~ D-FensDogG

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  8. "Uneasy Rider" has been one of my favorites for many a year, and while Tiny Tim sounded as great as ever (and the song had a rather strong Shel Silverstein aura about it) I'm stickin' with my old boy Charlie on this'un...

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    1. SIR JOHN ~

      Thanks so much for heading over here with your two cents for the BOTB kitty!

      Yes, good call on the Shel Silverstein-like feeling of 'Then I'd Be Satisfied With Life'. The original was actually written by George M. Cohan. However, Tiny added a number of touches (including, of course, "Tuesday Weld") which made it even more fun.

      I love Tiny's stuffs! He really puts me in a lighthearted mood, which this sad, rebellious world could use a whole lot mo' of.

      ~ D-FensDogG

      Delete
  9. If I only owned Western Union cable
    And if Tuesday Weld would only be my wife
    (*Tiny, I love you!*)
    If I could only stay sixteen forever and ever and ever
    Then I know that I'd be satisfied with life.


    At first glance, I thought that middle part was you leaving a comment on the lyrics, knowing how much you like Tuesday Weld. You didn't even say John Wayne, John Wayne! Then I realized it was part of the song. Whew! Don't scare me like that... unless that's an elaborate April Fool's joke.

    Believe it or not, I'm boting Tiny Tim. And that's no April Foolin'. I can absolutely appreciate his talent, but as some of the others have mentioned, I think I like his singing a lot more when it's not entirely his falsetto. So, I dig this song a lot. It's got a wonderful charm to it, and while Charlie actually rhymed a certain word with 'flag' in his (and got an unexpected GOL out of me), I do like Tiny's song a bit more.

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    1. BROTHER BEER BOY BRYAN
      BODYGUARD BETTY! ~

      Hey, muchos gracias for coming by with an entertaining "bote", mi amigo!

      Oh, fer sure, there ain't nut'n wrong with Tuesday Weld. Although... methinks I'd rather not be married to her in Los Angeles in 1992. That's a fate which should be reserved for a cop.

      I'm with you on Tiny's voice. Although I *do* like some of the songs he sang in the falsetto, generally speaking, I definitely also prefer his baritone approach to tunes.

      And it would probably come as a surprise to most people to learn that I never really liked Tiny's big hit, 'Tip-Toe Thru The Tulips'. That was the only T.T. song I knew when I bought a 3-CD boxed set of his music. I really didn't expect to like any of it. But I'll *never* forget the day I started listening to the discs, just for the helck of it, and was shocked - SHOCKED!! - to find how much I enjoyed so much of it. (Old dog, new tricks!)

      ~ Stephen T.

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  10. I'm here..I love Charlie but this sounded almost one note to Mr so, surprisingly I'm voting for TINY Tim and his wish for Tuesday Weld. You can tell how much he loves the old ways of singing.

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    1. Howdy, BIRGIT!

      Thanks so much for coming by with your two cents for the BOTB kitty. As of your vote, my Battle is now tied up 5 to 5. Dang! Gotta goot juan here!

      Yes, Tiny was fully devoted to ye olde style music. I've read a lot about him, including the nearly 500-page biography 'ETERNAL TROUBADOUR: The Improbable Life Of Tiny Tim' by Justin Martell.

      The man was literally a walking encyclopedia of old musical recordings. He could mention recordings that no one else could even remember, tell you what date the song was published, who wrote it, what label produced it, and precisely what the catalogue number was. His knowledge used to astound professional musicians and music producers!

      I've come to believe that most likely, Tiny Tim was what, today, we would refer to as "autistic". Kind of like the 'Rain Man' of music!

      And one thing I love about him is how 100% authentic he was. Most people thought that his entire shtick was just a big put-on... until they actually met him for the first time and discovered that he really was *exactly* as he appeared to be on stage and television screens. If ever there was a person fearless in being completely their true self, it was Tiny Tim.

      Plus, I'm also being 100% honest when I write about how much I enjoy so much of his music. I'm definitely not attempting to just portray myself as being odd or "out there".

      “MOST OF ALL, I’D LOVE TO SEE CHRIST COME BACK TO CRUSH THE SPIRIT OF HATE AND MAKE MEN PUT DOWN THEIR GUNS. I’D ALSO LIKE JUST ONE MORE HIT SINGLE.”
      ~ TINY TIM
      [Interviewed by Harold Ramis for
      Playboy magazine, June, 1970]

      I only bought that magazine for the articles. But when I came across that quote one day, I laughed, and that's what really ignited my interest in big Tiny.

      And then in about 2001 or 2002, when my Brother initiated the traditional 'Christmas Day wish for a second Tiny Tim hit song', my interest really went to a new level.

      Thanks again for your participation, Birgit!

      ~ D-FensDogG

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  11. Al Bondigas here. Very interesting battle youse got goin on. I thought both were enjoyable and great selections for April Fools Day. Well, I guess I'm gonna go with the one that made me chuckle the most. So I'm rulin fer Tiny Tim. That's it, that's muh rulin!!!

    Judge Chuckles.

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    1. JUDGE CHUCKLES ~

      Who you?!

      I've heard of Judge Henry X. Harper.
      I've heard of Judge Mills Lane.
      I've heard of Judge Roy Bean.
      I've heard of Judge Wapner.
      I've heard of Judge Judy.
      I've heard of Judge-Not-Lest-Ye-Be-Judged.

      But... who you?!

      I'll take it on blind faith that ye be a judge.
      And I thanks ya fer yer rulin',... "Judge-y!"

      [1,936 kudos to any reader who un'erstan's the joke hidden in that last sentence.]

      ~ D-FensDogG

      Delete
  12. And Stephen…

    I forgot about that Charlie Daniel’s song. Never been a big fan if Tiny Tim but the dong was interesting indeed. Not however enough to gain my vote. Charlie Daniels gets my vote. Greetings from Athens where everything is old and broken!

    JW,

    Pooohooohoo

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    1. Song not dong

      Delete
    2. ...AND, GENERAL POOHREGARD, THAT'S NOT ALL!...

      Very few friends would take the time while on a vacation (and a vacation on the other side of the globe, no less) to submit a vote in a BOTB contest. And especially one as silly as this one is.

      I thanks ya, friend, and I tips my Stetson to ya!

      >>... where everything is old and broken!

      There was a time when I didn't even know who Tom Waits was. But then you stepped in and straightened out my life. I owe you a pizza, Pooh! (More than just one, or a few.)

      Do you think I have any Tom Waits songs lined up to be used in future BOTB's BATTLE OF THE BOOZE contests? Yer dern betcha I has! In fact, I'll get one posted here pert-dern soon, just because thou hast inspired me.

      Dong, song, pong, Kong... it'z all good, McBuddy! Stay safe, have fun, and tell Saint Paul I said, "Howdy, Pauly!"

      ~ D-FensDogG

      POSTSCRIPT: Yesterday, at the very moment I saw your comment for the first time, I happened to be watching [Link> THIS video. You don't suppose I was immediately reminded of you falling into the Venice canals one afternoon, circa 1984, do ya? GOL!

      Delete

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